Saturday, July 24, 2010

The Haunted Duck


Loyal readers, I know you have missed my daily blog posts, but you must be aware that I am in the midst of unraveling a great mystery, a mystery so profound, perpetrated by a villain so dark, that, well, it simply boggles the mind. Yes, that's right this arch villain is none other than THE BOGGLER.

Several weeks ago I was awakened from a midday slumber by the incessant cackling and quacking of one of my many duck toys. This sad creature is pictured above resting in a bowl of fruit, but do not be deceived, dear reader, this duck was once possessed by the most diabolical and fiendish spirit known to mankind, that's right, THE BOGGLER.

After some investigation, "she" was able to locate the source of the manic quacking. He was hiding in the Chinese Chest where "he" keeps his cookbooks. I was able to seize the demented wretch and give him several death shakes, but all to no avail. He kept up the damned quacking.

"She" took him away, though not before I was able to rip the stuffing out of one of his vile orange feet. (Subsequent laboratory analysis by Dr. Monkey T. Frog and Dr. M&M provided no clues, though it must be conceded that these nitwits never provide any useful information and are perpetually stumped). However, he kept up his cackling even when locked back in the Chinese Chest and later placed on the highest shelf of the Red Cupboard. The manic, haunted episodes went on for days before we found the poor creature lying exhausted in a bowl of fruit.

"He" dismisses the whole episode as some sort of malfunction of the things battery. What a load of BS! Ducks don't have batteries. And anyway, how do you account for the mysterious appearance of the Ziggurats. about which more will be revealed in subsequent postings? That's right, I'm not joking here, somebody is seriously messing with my mind. When I wake up I find these bizarre structures built up of pillows and hassocks and toys. I'll take a picture next time and show you. This is driving me nuts. This diabolical, arch-fiend THE BOOGGLER is behind it all.

I gathered together the four sponges and all my frogs for a council. We agree that we must break out into the real world again and hunt him down. But then my adventures in the real world, which have been chronicled in earlier postings, have been a little scary and not very successful. What to do? WHAT TO DO?

I live now in mortal terror. I can't even take a nap without one of these Ziggurats appearing. As soon as I demolish one, another springs up. And that damned, infernal quacking. I cannot get it out of my mind.

HELP!!!!

No comments:

The "Fat Man"

The "Fat Man"
We find him strangely intriguing but they won't let us at him. I think they just want to torment us. Life sucks. One of these days me and Bob are going to get him.

This is the sink we hid under last week.

This is the sink we hid under last week.
Me and old Bob came thisclose to being wiped out by a tornado headed STRAGHT to Lakeview! That was a close one!