Swimming pool tragedy at Snail Hts Community Center!

TOWN TATTLER, FEBRUARY23, 2009. 11:00 AM
...........................................................................................................

"Early morning joggers were HORRIFIED by the discovery of the water-logged corpse of former Mayor Spinalzo's Press Secretary "Bigfoot." Efforts to revive the poor wretch proved fruitless.

"We don't know what happened here," cried the former Mayor, "but we will get to bottom of this business, come what may."

"Observers noted that the demise of "Bigfoot" is yet ANOTHER in a series of bewildering events which began with the mysterious disappearances of the former Mayor's wives "Little Dorrit" the other one whose name no one can remember. Searchers have yet to find a TRACE of them or their remains."

"In a SHOCKING gesture, the former Mayor took control of the investigation, vowing prompt and ruthless action against the malefactors, if any. He also asserted that since he is the only actual presence now living in his particular area of Snail Hts., he would be re-assuming the title of Mayor along with all the perquisites of office." (HUH???)

"The Dude", another being living in an adjacent natural habitat, issued an immediate challenge to the Mayor's high-handed actions. "This will not stand," "The Dude" exclaimed.
(Whoa!! This is getting juicy, bloggee!!)

"Close observers of the political scene in Snail Hts. believe the Mayor remains the principal suspect in all these events."

Services for "Bigfoot" are private. His house has been donated to science." (SOB!)

P.S. For those of you following the "progress" (or LACK of same...) re: the ongoing TESTING process of SPONG BOB - stay tuned there may be some INTERESTING results coming in later today!