My dear Phineas,

We were quite disturbed to note the evident misunderstanding that has occurred in relation to our earlier post about the wearing of fur by those who do not grow fur. We had no intention of arousing your all too understandable ire.

We ourselves grow our own fur, and exceptionally fine fur it is, I might add. In addition, my most trusted advisor, Bear, is a bear, although admittedly merely a stuffed bear, not the magnificent wild specimen that you are. Many of my most treasured animal friends are also bears.

Please accept our most humble apologies for this tragic confusion, unless, of course, you have been put up to this by one of our arch-enemies, a certain SP who shares your city address, in which case, sir, you have been sadly misled.

Master Pip