While out watering my plants on the deck today, hoping to visit with my dear snail friends, "Tip" and "Tap" before they go into hiberation for the winter - I found a grungy old recipe under the table - Let me straighten it out and see what is says:
Snail Soup:
10,000 snails
1 ton of whey (carefully sifted)
4 cups sparrows
11 golden raisins
32 frog's eyes
a "smidge" of dust bunnies
1/8 teaspoon of mealy bugs
300 lbs Oscar Mayer weiners
1 set adult adenoids
30 pr of twin toads
1 medium sized yuppie
4 sofa cushions
1 42" flat screen TV
11 lbs of great toenails
18 oz belly button lint
3 Webster dictionaries
1/2 ton of warts (all sizes and colors)
Add all dry ingredients together. Stir well in large (!) caldron. Combine liquid and gelatenous stuff until completely congealed.
Mix for 3 days and 5 nights under a starless sky. Season to taste.
Serve with garlic croutons in large animal skulls. Garnish with recycled spinach and serve hot.
Feeds 2000.
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The "Fat Man"
We find him strangely intriguing but they won't let us at him. I think they just want to torment us. Life sucks. One of these days me and Bob are going to get him.
This is the sink we hid under last week.
Me and old Bob came thisclose to being wiped out by a tornado headed STRAGHT to Lakeview! That was a close one!
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